I'll try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure. ~ Mae West

I had a lot of dates but I decided to stay home and dye my eyebrows. ~ Andy Warhol

You gotta risk it to get the biscuit.

Let The Music Play ~ Growing Pains Circa The 80's

Music is my religion. ~ Jimi Hendrix

My ex-fiancee' who I might add has been out of my life for 10 years recently approached me on facebook. He said that he missed me and that we would still be together if he would have treated me better. Um, think again buddy. I am okay without you. Trust me. I must also mention that he inquired about what kind of panties I was wearing. It is safe to say that I am wearing the kind that would spit nails and throw razor blades at him if he got within a state of me. Let's just say, he wasn't the right guy for me. My parents tried to tell me every day of our relationship. They hated him. Every time we went out for Chinese they came armed with their own fortune cookies. They were specially made and included messages about how I needed to dump my boyfriend. It took me 8 years to see the light. This prompted me to think of all of the reasons why I would never rekindle a relationship with him and also made me think of reasons why he should not want to marry me. I could only think of one. I am a terrible singer. I used to torture him by laying in bed late at night and singing 10 second clips of every 80's song known to the human race. It was a spurt of musical Attention Deficit Disorder. Secretly, he loved it and that is why he is begging for more. Not going to happen!

Music has always been my savior as I am sure it has been everyone else's as well.  Sometimes music is the only thing to get your mind off everything else.  As a child, I spent more time in the corner and locked in my room as I did anywhere else so I needed something to entertain me. I had a new favorite song every other day. What made me feel so entitled to scream, "that's my song, that's my song!"? I would sit by the radio for endless hours waiting for my favorite song to come on the radio so I could tape it. The 80's weren't that advanced, but they were FUN! You had to make sure you pressed the "orange" button to record. I had blisters from hitting that button. The worst part was that whatever was going on in the background was recorded as well. My mother would yell that it was time for dinner and there it was right smack dab in the middle of "You Dropped A Bomb On Me" by The Gap Band...DDDIIINNNEEERRR!!!

I had a wide range of musical influences as a child. My first 45 was "Heart Of Glass" by Blondie and my first album was "Back In Black" by AC/DC. I can't forget 8 tracks. I owned one 8 track tape and it was the "GREASE" soundtrack. My parents slid their influence in there once in awhile and when they did it was definitely entertaining. My sister and I would play their Kenny Rogers And The Fifth Edition album and put on quite the show. You haven't seen "Good Vibrations" performed until you have see 2 children jump off the fireplace hearth lip syncing.

The neighbors on each side of me put my music collection to shame. One had "Bad Girls" by Donna Summer and the "9 To 5" soundtrack. I found myself prancing around singing...
Some men find her sexy, some men disagree
But if she's not, it's not because she doesn't want to be
She wears a push-up bra from Frederick's, five inch high heel shoes
Maybelline and Rubinstein, and Avon's best perfume
She's a working girl

She's a working girl, she is single and free
She's a mother and wife and she's proud to be
A working girl

I was 10 years old and had no clue, but needless to say I have sported a push-up bra and many other items from Frederick's of Hollywood along with 5 inch high heeled shoes since then.

It's funny. I would sing all of these songs as a child and had no idea what the lyrics meant, however, I would soon find out and begin to act out the lyrics. For example, "She's a very kinky girl, the kind you don't take home to mother" or "Ticket to ride, white line highway, Tell all your friends, they can go my way, Pay your toll, sell your soul, Pound for pound costs more than gold, The longer you stay, the more you pay, My white lines go a long way, Either up your nose or through your vein, With nothin' to gain except killin' your brain". "White Lines" by Grandmaster Flash featuring Melle Mel was about cocaine, urging listeners not to do it while making the case that drug laws in the US are racist and unjust, since poor black kids tend to get much harsher penalties for drug offenses than white businessmen. It was the first hit rap song about drugs.


My other neighbor got "Freeze Frame" by J Geil's Band when it first came out. I would sit in her living room all afternoon after school and listen to that album. Listening to "Piss On The Wall" made me feel like a rebel at such a young age even though I had been putting sailors to shame since I was 6 years old. I learned all of the major descriptive words on the curb in front of my house. As soon as I heard them it was as if a whistle was blown and someone yelled "GO"! I made an Olympic sport out of cussing. I will never forget the day she let me borrow her Midnight Star "No Parking On The Dance Floor" cassette tape so I could make a copy. I was afraid to ask her, because she was much older than me, but I was thrilled when she let me borrow it, because there was to be absolutely no parking on the dance floor!

The invention of the "boom box" or "ghetto blaster" provided the imaginary friend that I never needed. I would sit in my front yard with my friends and listen to Run DMC and Rappin' Duke and wait for neighborhood hottie to come visit me. This was an everyday occurence. Every day, like clockwork, he would ride his bike by my house and stop and stay for hours. : )

And then there were videos. Yes, I was one of many who witnessed the first music video on MTV. You would have to be a complete moron to not know that it was "Video Killed The Radio Star" by The Buggles. I was hooked and I wanted my MTV! Before MTV, we would watch videos on a show called " Night Flight" on TBS. Every Friday night in the neighborhood there was a slumber party with young girls slobbering all over the television as Duran Duran videos played on and on.

I loved everything from "Moon River" by Henry Mancini to anything by Jimi Hendrix and The Rolling Stones to LL Cool J and Scritti Politti and even Metallica before they became mainstream.

And then the 90's creeped up on us and everything went to SHIT! The music of the 90's spewed messages about suicide, teen angst and cross colors. I preferred the music of the 60's, 70's and 80's with messages of peace, herbal refreshments, hot pink hair and dancing. The 80's weren't perfect though since we have to suffer through "Elvira" by The Oak Ridge Boys, but that era was pretty close. It's all good though, because last night a DJ saved me life. True story.